The Pastor's Buzz

Pastor Buzz Trexler's blog for God's people in The Meadow.

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Name: Buzz Trexler
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee, United States

Journalist for 29 years; married to Donna for 28 years; parent of David, 27, and Elizabeth, 24; pastor of Green Meadow United Methodist Church in Alcoa since 2002.

Tuesday, October 12, 2004

Love the one you serve ...

Since my lectionary group did not meet today, I went to The Meadow on my dinner break to clean up from Sunday's worship service.

Sea shells still dotted the altar rail, leftover from the Remember Your Baptism service; sermon notes added more clutter to the pulpit.

I ate my Chic-fil-A nuggets and large cole slaw before heading into the Sanctuary. As I gathered the shells and cleaned out the pulpit (a task long needed), I found myself talking to God -- no, I should say "shouting" at God.

Things seem so out of whack these days, but it's much too complicated for a blog.

I alternated between shouting and singing. "Precious Lord" rang through the rafters even more loudly than my questions to God.

Then, as I will ocassionally do, I took a small bottle of anointing oil and anointed the various pews, altar rail and areas where people serve, praying a blessing as I went.

At some point, I found myself at the piano, running my fingers across the keys in mock recital.

Then, I laid my head in my hands and felt so very tired ... and the words came.

"I want you to do something ..."

"What do you want me to do, Lord?"

"I want you to love me more than the work."

I knew what the Lord was saying: Just as the pagans love the creation more than the Creator, we who serve sometimes love the service more than the one we serve.

Lord, I do love you more than the work. But you know that there are places in my heart that are not as loving as they ought to be.

Lord, I believe; help me in my unbelief.

Lord, I love you; help me in those areas where I do not love you as I should.